It all started a couple of days ago when I got an invitation to my 15 year high school reunion. They want updates on everyone, and sent out a questionaire that asked for the highlights of my life for the past 5 years. I didn't know what to write because my life has just been crazy. Then this afternoon it went into a spiral. I headed up to Primary Children's Hospital with 4 kids in tow for Toby's appointment. On the way home, I stopped at Costco to get some milk. Lily had to use the bathroom, so she and I went in the store. I left Kyle in charge in the car, as DJ was taking a much needed nap. When I came back out to the car, it was surrounded by police officers and Costco employees. Now keep in mind, I have done this before, and Kyle knows all the rules. I left him my cell phone. The car was running with the AC on. Kyle locked the doors after I went in. So my thought is (Oh noooo something bad happened!!) But no, it was just a grandma and bunch of Costco employees who decided I had abandoned my children and they were in grave danger (despite Kyle telling them I would be right back and they were fine). I was so embarrassed (still am) and felt horrible. Come to find out, it's a law that I can't leave my children in a running car until Kyle is 12 (he will be soon, but that doesn't matter ugh). But not knowing this law doesn't matter, because despite the crowds and gossip and drama of it all, I got myself a nice ticket! Ok so that goes on my list for my highlights along with....
*My son nearly died and was diagnosed with Leukemia
*My husband left me
*I had to move from AZ to Utah because I couldn't take care of my ill son and my other children alone
*I moved into my parents basement
*I met a wonderful man and married him, gaining 3 more children, and sending 2/3 of our income off to his x-wife. Hospital bills and mouths to feed (thank heavens for his savings....and thank heavens she'll marry soon so we wont lose our home).
*My best friend since the 3rd grade writes me off completely because 'we are on different paths'
* I got pregnant and threw up every day for 5 months..... DJ was born making "Yours Mine and Ours" and uniting our family (what a blessing he truly is)
*My daughter got kidney reflux and spent a year on antibiotics
*I broke my right ankle
*My son finished chemotherapy treatment! YAY! (with 5 years left of monthly blood draws before he's considered in remission)
*My daughter lost 2/3 of her kidney, and had to have invasive surgery to correct the problem
*My son had surgery to remove his port-a-cath
*My sister got upset with me and wont speak to me
*I got a ticket and watched people gossip and imply that I am bad mother :(
Now, I know that there are more pleasant hightlights and of course many blessings, but out the big things that have happened in my life, the traumatic/bad outnumber the good. And it seems neverending now. :(
I know I shouldn't be so negative, and I really do know that I have been blessed even through the crappiest days of it all, but I just want a normal life without all the drama. Ok enough whining.
Happy Birthday to my amazingly wonderful husband last month!!!!
Don't you just LOVE DJ in this picture.... I think it's hilarious!!!
Dave, thank you for being one of the positive highlights in my life!!! You are such a blessing. You are a wonderful husband and father!!! You are talented and smart and occasionally funny ;) I love you!!!!!
Happy Birthday Brandon!!!!!!!!
Brandon got a 'super pickle' cake (design by Kyle lol) Brandon, you are 1 of 3 of the best children to have entered my life. You are growing up so quickly and becoming such a handsome young man (mushy cheesy, but nice to hear nonetheless right?) You are a great brother and a great son. I love you.
Now here are some pictures that we took on our trip to AZ last week. We didn't take many, but the ones we got were cute. I sure do miss AZ and my friends there. Everytime I go back I feel like it's my home and I cry. Maybe someday we'll be able to move back.
Duck Pond (or something like that lol)
Trees in Kanab when we stopped to stretch
DJ napping in the car
Red Rock Canyon
Arizona Science Center.... Knight DJ
14 comments:
Tara,
You have to read this blog:
http://freerangekids.wordpress.com/
--cro
You just gave me another reason not to go to Costco. ;)
And I LOVE lemons!
I dont' know what to say, but I love your honesty! I love lemons too! They are tart, but they do so many good things. They are definately lifesavers. I think you may be a lemon!!!
Hey Tara, this is your cousin Trent's wife Lichelle. I love reading your blog and think you are amazing. Every time I have been around you, you have been happy and fun and kind and loving. That seriously says a lot. Thanks for touching my life for good.
That is crazy! I didn't know that is a law! And I think it takes a special person to raise a big family! Props to you! You're a good mom! Don't let it get to you!
There are many WONDERFUL things made from lemons...I love them too.
We always see ourselves differently than others see us--we are always much harder on ourselves, and we never give ourselves the credit we would give to someone else.
What I see when I look at you? A beautiful, extremely talented, incredibly STRONG woman and amazing mother, who has kept her family together, her kids happy, and has created a wonderful life and happy home despite really tough circumstances. I have always admired you so much--and always will. Hang in there--lemonade is around the corner!
If you're looking for the bright side, I bet no one else at your 15 year reunion can top that list!
But you forgot to write, "And did it all with a smile on my beautiful face!" You are a tuff, tuff woman. And an excellent mother.
Everything else be hanged!
p.s. how much was the ticket? (so I can weigh whether or not it's worth it to let my children sleep while I run overdue library books to the deposit box. For heaven's sake.).
ok, so tara, this blog made me cry!!!! your life has had so many challenges that few of us could have handled. well, it can only go up from here!
thanks for always making life into lemonaide. love ya!
Tara,
My my oldest two children were young, they were taking a much needed nap in the car. They were both young enough that I had to carry both whenever I went anywere. I left them in my car at Costco for 2 minutes just to drop film off at the outside film drop off, they were in my sight and I was still outside. When I got back to my car an employee was there because someone had reported me. One time someone got after me for leaving my baby in the car while I walked behind it to get a grocery cart to put him in, i was about 20 feet away. Some people over do it and forget what it is like hauling children everywhere with you. I think you are awesome and probably a better person for everything you have gone through.
You are not a lemon, and I'd have to say you've made fantastic lemonaide with the lemons you've been dealt. By the way, that Set game is a lot of fun!!! I can't wait to see you next weekend at GWO!!!
It was great to talk to you today! You are terrific. I love you, sister! I love the pictures too!
that makes me mad. People should mind their own business and who is stupid enough to make it a law anyway? I was feeling stupid writing out the questionairre too. Humm. I had 3 more kids in the last 5 years putting us with 4 under 6! Crazy. I can sympathize but yours is a little crazier. I'm sorry I haven't been a better friend but I'm still here :) I will be at the reunion. Does that mean you're going?
I love your blog. It makes me smile. You are so honest and it is heart felt. Even though, I don't think you are a lemon, I can see why you would after that list you made! LOL
Tara!!! Wow thank you for your honesty!!! Sometimes I get sick of reading how great everyones life is, when you know that life is not always great. I am so sorry for all your hardships, please know that you are not being negitive just REAL.
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